10 Ways to Become a Better Communicator

In this post I outline 10 ways to become a better communicator. Here they are.

1. Become aware of your state of consciousness (your feelings). There are 3 main states that determine your outlook on life and they are; contracted, neutral, expansive. Notice how your assumptions, ideologies, premise, perceptions and projections are shaped by your motive for participation - which can either be reluctant or whole-hearted depending on your state of consciousness (see above).

2. Express clearly and concisely your feelings. Then link these with the speed of light to your wants, desires and needs. For example, "I feel frustrated because I have a need for honesty, which in this instance, is not being met."

3. Go into any conversation with an open mind. Don't profess to know the absolute truth to any given situation. This just severs any meaningful connection that may be developing between 2 people.  Rather try stay open, without the need to determine the outlook of another person's perspective.

4. Seek out other people with differing points of view, but who at the same time have a stake in the project you're engaged in. Ask yourself how can you integrate these different points of view into your vision. Broaden your horizons. Grow, stretch!

5. Notice how you fit into the overall project or system in which you're based. Examine closely your role in the outcome of events. How does your behavior and communication shape external environments? To what extent are you managing relationships to get the best out of all involved?

6. Listen with empathy. Can you authentically put yourself in someone else's shoes? Can you take on another perspective without the need to judge, blame or find fault, but merely to observe?

7. Listen to your own ideological points of view, as well as other stake holders' perspectives. And don't forget to relate this back to the overarching theme of why you're here and what you're trying to achieve (vision, goals, mission).

8. Take a break from your inner circle of dialogue. Remove yourself completely from the decision making process. And clear the air to allow yourself some space to reflect and contemplate the outcome of events. Let the answers arise intuitively out of this clear space.

9. Be relaxed, open, flowing - like water. As a river flows, follow the path of least resistance. Allow yourself to be fully present, to live in the moment, opening yourself up to personal growth.

10. Once you've experimented with these communication techniques, go back to the drawing board. Notice what's working and what's not working. Approach the concepts that aren't working from a different angle for a fresh perspective on how to move forward. And keep learning!

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