Over-thinking...

is one of the characteristics of being stuck inside a victim mindset. This can cause a whole host of negative emotions that impacts our well being and our sense of self worth.

Why do we over-think things and what are some of the symptoms of over-thinking?

We tend to over-think things when we're stuck inside a mindset that plays a broken record that limits us and prevents us from moving forward to connect with our values.

More often than not, over-thinking is caused by the idea that there's something wrong. Our attention then bounces around from one thought to the next, trying to get rid of this uncomfortable feeling. But this only serves to exacerbate the problem, causing a lack of focus and clarity, limiting our outcomes.

The more we try to control our thoughts, the more anxious, overwhelmed, tense, angry or depressed we become. We may have trouble sleeping, tossing and turning we can't get the tape recorder to stop playing. And it's likely that those thoughts are limiting to some extent or another. We lock ourselves into negative stories, either about the past, or fear of the future, reminding us about everything that's wrong with us.

How do we escape such thinking so it doesn't have such a negative impact on our sense of well being?

Well, first we have to recognize that it's unlikely that we'll ever get rid of negative emotions or limiting thoughts. But we can create, through mindfulness training, the space in which these thoughts and emotions no longer affect us as badly. How do we do this? Here are some pointers:

• Increase your mindfulness. This is something that can be practiced throughout your day through moment to moment awareness training. A good place to start is by focusing in on one thing, like a blade of grass or an object in your office. Maintaining your focus, integrate a light peripheral awareness at the same time. You'll be amazed that you can be focused and aware at the same time. Practice this throughout your day.
• Spend 5 minutes focusing on the sensations in your body. Close your eyes for 5 minutes and place your attention on sensations from the top of your head running down to the tips of your toes. Be sure to cover every part of your body. Once you complete the cycle you can run your attention back up to your head again. This is an excellent grounding exercise, taken from the principles of vipassana meditation.
• Focus on your breathing. When we're over-thinking things its easy to get locked into a contracted state of consciousness. In order to break this we need to bring our awareness back into the present moment and focusing on your breath is a great way to do this. You can just place your attention on the in-flow and out-flow of breath whenever you notice your attention drifting to multiple thought processes, especially those negative, limiting ones.
• Another great way to create some space between you and your thoughts is to just observe your thoughts without judgement. How do we do this? Well, let's say I have the thought that I'm not good enough. Then here's what I do with this thought; I say to myself, "aah, I'm noticing I'm having the thought that I'm not good enough." Doing this distances you from the victim thought, giving you the space to reconnect with your values or vision.

Thoughts are just words that run through our mind a million times a day. But what we do have control over is where we place our attention. We can choose which words to believe. Some are more useful than others, in that they serve our growth and development. We need to then become acutely aware of those thoughts that reinforce limit and prevent us from living the life we want. And choose very careful the stories we choose to tell ourselves and believe. 

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